Check out also http://solofemininity.blogs.com/posts/ for Carolyn McCulley's comments on the article.
From I'm Just Not Attracted To Her, Part 2
by Michael Lawrence
Finally, immerse yourself in a counter-cultural understanding of beauty. I stand by what I said at the beginning: Beauty is culturally determined and we cannot escape our culture. If you are surrounded by people and media that say beauty is merely a matter of body shape and color, then you will find it almost impossible to be attracted to anything else. But if you are in regular conversation with people who think otherwise, if you are listening to messages that say otherwise, if you witness passionate, intimate marriages that prove otherwise, then your definition of beauty and your sense of attraction will be changed by that culture. Where can you find such a culture?
You can find it only in a healthy, biblical, local church.
As Christians, we are citizens of more than one culture. The Bible presents a
worldview, including a definition of beauty, that's opposed to the worldview of
our culture. But a worldview that is not lived out is just dead theory. The
biblical worldview takes on counter-cultural life in the context of the church.
In the community of God's people, as we listen to God's word and allow it to
transform us, we find the vision of beauty we need to transform our preferences
and desires from weak, worldly lusts into strong, godly attraction to true beauty.
What's more, in this kind of culture, women understand what it means
to be truly beautiful, and they know how to pursue that beauty. Most of all,
they are confident that attaining such beauty is worth it. Not just so the guys
will notice them, but because the guys have encouraged them above all to shape
the whole of their lives for the loving gaze of God. His eyes never fail to
recognize true beauty and his heart never fails to be attracted to it. Men, why
would we want to be any different?