It was an email I got today that uncovered an area of unteachability. It just hit a nerve. That's not a bad thing. The darkness peeled away, leaving my sin shivering and exposed in the Light. It doesn't feel good. It's not supposed to. But I needed this. There is Someone who is aware of how much I needed this, even though it is a struggle, and only He knows how pride has been affecting me and others in my life, as well as my relationship with Him. I'm glad that He has chosen this moment to show me a little. If He showed me everything all at once, it would probably incapacitate me.
The trouble is that I wonder how much others had noticed this pride in me before I did--I cringe. More pride hurt about being found out that I am proud. The Emperor is naked. My blindspot is not obvious to me, but perhaps it has been to others.
God is gracious, and He is generous with it. That's good because I really need it. Will it prevent me from being proud again? Probably not. But it makes me hate it.
"He will again have compassion on us, He will tread our iniquities underfoot. Yes, Thou wilt cast all their sins to the depths of the sea." Micah 7:19
"Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Thy sight, O LORD, my rock and my Redeemer." Psalm 19:14
"Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." Psalm 139:23-24