Sunday, May 11, 2008

I was watching a bit of a movie a while ago, an old one. The husband is taking off for work in the morning, saying good bye to his wife who sat at her vanity table putting on nail polish. It was just a blip in the plot, but it stuck with me as several impressions flashed in my brain circuitry. One was remembering that it was established earlier in the movie that the couple was well off enough to have a housekeeper. The other was that this woman had nothing to do with her time except work at looking good. And sure enough, the wife's next scene was her greeting her husband looking better than good. Like her main purpose in life was being his ornament. But since she was such a lovable character as well, no one held it against her. A perfect companion--no complaining, no demands, no mood swings, no hormones and certainly no problems. She was free from any concerns of her own to be available to him.

Loving her would be easy.

But in real life, love is not easy. Not for me, at least. And I don't assume it is for my dear hubby either. When we were dating, we talked about how many deep personal flaws we each had. I told Dennis that I had plenty of baggage to unpack and I didn't know how long it would take. Which is an understatement. After we exchanged vows, my few suitcases turned into several steamer trunks. Den's has remained just a few pieces of luggage still, with the locks stuck and the keys lost, resistent to opening but at least we got some of the carry-ons taken care of.

And you know, I don't want to open the rest. I just accept that they exist. And that God knows the contents and really, only He understands what's in there. He carries the burdens and shows me how to love and accept love. It's not easy, because of selfishness and sin. I'm learning that the most valuable and closest connections happen through sacrifices and work. If it was easy, would it be as wonderful? I doubt it.

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